Daniel, Author of Relationships and Sex
Sex: Dispelling Common Myths
- Myth: Size matters most. Reality: Sexual satisfaction is complex and varies.
- Myth: Women can’t fake orgasms. Reality: Orgasm can be complex, simulated, or absent.
- Myth: Sex is always spontaneous. Reality: Healthy sexual relationships involve planning & communication.
- Myth: Only young people have great sex. Reality: Sexuality evolves, and can be fulfilling at any age.
- Myth: “Normal” sex exists. Reality: Healthy sexuality is diverse and personal.
- Myth: Sex is only for procreation. Reality: Pleasure and intimacy are core aspects of sex.
- Myth: Porn reflects typical sex. Reality: Porn is stylized, not a guide to real-life sexuality.
References:
Source: 123rf iol
The web facilitates the circulation of information, including false however. And about sex, sexuality and affectivity there is a lot of it, so much so that doctors and gynecologists are concerned. Hoaxes about the body, false myths about conception and contraception. Be careful not to take the bait, because it is to the detriment of the wellness, feeling inadequate, sexual health. Let’s see what not to believe in for a peaceful and respectful sexuality.
We still fall for it, and a lot
These are not very recent, but quite significant. According to the Italian Society of Gynecology and Obstetrics – SIGO Federation more than 1 in 5 young Italians, over 20% of 20-30 year olds, retrieve information about sex and contraception online. Unverified content, from unofficial sources, confusing and spreading bogus and counterproductive information. 2% of girls believe there is a link between shoe size and penis size, just to give an example.
To counter this trend, SIGO has activated the Choose You service, with an informative part, an informal but well-edited and reliable blog, and the Talk to the Expert section to ask specific questions that expert gynecologists will answer. Again, SIGO has produced two streamlined pamphlets for very young women/men that are easily available online: “All the Answers About Sex and Conscious Contraception” and “Sex Without Surprises. Everything you don’t need to know about getting pregnant.” There are some really bizarre ones, others that many girls actually believe.
#iol_player_container.vjs-top-parent-mobile width: 100%; position: fixed; z-index: 1000; left: 0;
What a confusion
“Today’s girls and boys are more connected,” comments the Prof. Rossella Nappi – But the information is not always so reliable. There is an excess of information, made accessible to all and sundry, even the very young, at an age when they do not have sufficient tools to process, understand and recognize fake news“. The main hoaxes that are being baited concern the body and appearance (size of penis, shape of vulva..); the sexuality (orgasm as the goal, obligatory jouissance…) but also theaffectivity.
“Relationships have also taken on a contemporary dimension, confused in their nature. Then it happens that having access to images with high sexual content, linked to a fluid orientation, referring to hypertrophic patterns can confuse young people and make them feel inadequate, with perceived problems that in fact are not problems. False myths are to be countered because they do not allow for Recognize what is normal, legitimate, to be respected; that’s why we believe that sentimental and sexual education is still very important.”
Here then are the 10 things not to believe. Never.
10 most common false myths
1. Less than a minute
You don’t get pregnant if intercourse lasts less than a minute. False. It may be less satisfying, but even if intercourse is very short, as can often happen to first-timers, the risk of pregnancy. While not reaching ejaculation and orgasm, it is likely that from the first contacts, fluid already containing spermatozoa, and that it makes contact with the vagina. That is why coitus interruptus cannot be considered a method of contraception and that is why brief intercourse can still be risky, right from foreplay.
2. It is impossible to get pregnant the first time
Even those who make love for the first time must protect themselves from the risk of unwanted pregnancy. That is why it is good to prepare in time and get information at the counseling center, midwife or gynecologist to have complete and adequate information about sexuality and contraception. Indeed, just if inexperienced and a bit clumsy, there is a risk of messing up and not protecting oneself adequately. Then, let’s remember, at a young age one is much more fertile than as an adult, so the risk is even higher. Prudence and awareness from early on!
3. Making love standing or in the water is protected
The position chosen for making love does not affect on the possibility of getting pregnant. If there is contact the risk of unwanted pregnancy exists. One might believe that making love while standing prevents the sperm from rising (due to the law of gravity) but this is absolutely not true. Spermatozoa have a kind of tail called a flagellum that moves very fast and allows them to move and shift, even uphill. And what about sex in water? Pleasurable and relaxing but still risky if unprotected. The spermatozoa live in water and can reach their coveted destination.
4. Masturbate first to consume the spermatozoa
The number and motility of spermatozoa can decrease, especially with advancing age, and it is also true that partners seeking pregnancy are advised not to have daily ejaculations. But this is not a sufficient reason to feel protected after his masturbation or multiple or daily intercourse. To get pregnant, if you want to, all you have to do is even one sperm!
5. No orgasm = No pregnancy
Caution: for fertilization to occur, the sperm-containing fluid must leak out, but that does not always coincide only with orgasm. In fact, there can be small spillages even before theejaculation. With his orgasm, on the other hand, ejaculation is certain and fertilization probable. In contrast, there is no link between female orgasm achievement and pregnancy. Some argue that the contraction caused by her orgasm may contribute to the retention of sperm within the body, increasing the chances of fertilization. What is certain is that if you do not use precautions you can get pregnant even without reaching orgasm.
6. Three whiskies for safe intercourse
If the boy drinks three whiskies before intercourse, the girl will not get pregnant. It sounds absurd and yet really this belief circulates. A chance, however, to better understand theeffect of alcohol on sexual performance. In fact, alcohol helps to be more uninhibited, this is true, but it can have negative consequences for sexuality, both immediately and in the long term. A man who has been drinking before sex may fall asleep, have erection problems or early or delayed ejaculation disorders. In addition, taking these substances tends to give a feeling of omnipotence and thus facilitates unprotected or violent intercourse. Maybe a little shyness is better!
7. Females have less desire
Unfortunately, this rumor comes from a macho and patriarchal culture, but it is definitely false. Men like women undoubtedly need to have a clear head, without thoughts, and perhaps the male gender is better able to get rid of them. But it is the testosterone which promotes libido development and the feeling of desire. Testosterone is mistakenly associated only with the male body, whereas, although in smaller amounts, women produce it in the ovaries and adrenal glands. Everyone and everyone, needs this hormone to maintain stable mood, energy levels, and the sex drive. Testosterone production peaks in the early hours of the morning, between 6:30 a.m. and 7:30 a.m., and it seems to be this time slot when the body is most likely to have sex.
8. Contraceptives protect always and from everything
There are so many contraceptives on the market, and it is a great opportunity to be able to choose from different types of protection, depending on each person’s needs and habits. Protection, however, is not the same for everyone. A condom protects against sexually transmitted diseases and from the risk of unwanted pregnancy, but it should be used well and included from the very first contacts. The pill for example has very good coverage on fertilization, but it does not limit contact and therefore does not protect against infection and disease. The same goes for the vaginal ring or IUD, for example. Informing yourself about all contraceptives is important to make an informed choice.
9. Friendship or love
In a world in which we make the fluidity a model, it is easy to get confused about the nature of what one is feeling. Older generations were used to confrontation in stages: first as a group, then of sharing, even intimately, with the best friend, and finally with the boyfriend. Today there is confusion about the concepts of identity and sexual orientation, attraction, affection. Very often people talk about promiscuity in the wrong terms. Being related to a person of the same sex does not necessarily mean being attracted to them, although at this time in history it is more recognized than in the past. Beware, then, of definitions circulating on the web, of inappropriate words that can really confuse one about the nature of one’s emotions and feeling.
10.No models, no expectations
The curved penis is crooked or the labia majora are too small to be normal…: there are so many circulating of False rumors about physical appearance, when there should be no such thing as one and only one role model. Every body is different and normal, and everyone has their own uniqueness to appreciate and enjoy. Likewise, try to stay away from false expectations. Who says it is mandatory to achieve orgasm? Why must penetration be necessary to experience pleasure? Every woman (and every man) experiences the body, sexuality, and pleasure differently. We do not seek standardization, we do not follow what they say or suggest. The advice is to explore and get to know each other, to be able to seek, without stereotype or fear of judgment, their own form of pleasure.
