Here are key tips for being comfortable with intimacy:
1. Communicate openly about desires, boundaries, and concerns.
2. Start slow and build trust gradually.
3. Practice self-acceptance and body positivity.
4. Create a relaxing environment free from distractions.
5. Focus on sensations and pleasure rather than performance.
6. Use humor to ease tension and lighten the mood.
7. Engage in non-sexual physical affection regularly.
8. Experiment with different forms of intimacy to find what feels best.
9. Address any underlying emotional issues or past traumas.
10. Practice mindfulness to stay present in the moment.
11. Avoid comparing your experiences to unrealistic expectations.
12. Prioritize hygiene and grooming to boost confidence.
13. Explore your own body to better understand your preferences.
14. Be patient with yourself and your partner as you grow together.
15. Consider seeking professional guidance if discomfort persists.
Remember, comfort in intimacy is a journey that requires ongoing effort and communication.
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What intimacy really is
If we look up the definition of intimacy in Wikipedia we find: sphere of feelings and affections most jealously guarded against the curiosity and indiscretion of others or even to the understanding between husband and wife. We like to remember that intimacy is not limited to genders or to a single type of union, that of marriage. Intimate is what we feel on our skin and in our soul, it is as much about the body as it is about the mind, and it has to do with living and experiences. The personal history in fact plays a very important role in how one chooses the person with whom to share and how one experiences the relationship with your partner Subsequently to the decision one feels from the heart and at the level of attraction.
Intimacy is first of all living the relationship with the other person in a condition of security, both physical and emotional. I can be serenely with the other person if I also experience the relationship with myself securely. La safety lies in quietly and joyfully experiencing one’s body and physicality. When this happens we can really think of letting go and we are also able to appreciate with pleasure the form and inwardness of each other.
It is often believed that the intimate sphere is not something that can be improved: wrong! Do not despair if you meet a person who likes you and likes you very much but embarrassment arises between the sheets. Progressively you must communicate, clarify yourselves, build your own vocabulary, yours alone. Intimacy is dynamic and changes with us, according to our tastes, our changes, our evolutions.
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Basic advice: get to know each other
Greek wisdom affirms this and is the basis of philosophy: self-knowledge corresponds to the personal power, the sum way, the one that opens wide the possibility of truly living life with meaning and significance. If this factor affects professional, family, and life choices, it surely also affects how we choose to experience pleasure. To develop authenticity with one’s partner one must have honesty about blocks, fears, cravings. To communicate I must first know, know these aspects of myself. To open up to the other person, I must first get to know myself.
If I know myself, I know what draws me back and attracts me. This should become a kind of “mantra” that urges one to Keep the focus on oneself/and. Impossible to seek pleasure in the other if one does not take pleasure in looking at one’s own image. It is not only about what the mirror sends back. Also very important is the rose of thoughts we choose to nurture. Often a posture that makes one less attractive is the result of a dislike nurtured with depowering thoughts. Instead, it is necessary through the right and balanced thoughts, Give oneself permission to like oneself, to take pleasure first and foremost in the image that the mirror reflects back to us.
Starting with your body: 5 basic steps
The first step to love one’s body therefore goes through the mind. The way we perceive ourselves is closely related to the things we tell ourselves about our bodies. Knowing our own rhythms, feeling how we like to be loved/and, understanding what the passion for us consists of, how we recognize it, how we feel it. So the second step concerns our physical body: how do I present myself? What image do I send back to others? How would I want to manifest myself in front of others?
The third step corresponds to comprehensively and precisely analyzing one’s movements, the way our body acts in the world. In other words, the way we occupy space with our body: if we move with embarrassment, uncertainty, what step we have, which one we would like, how the back is, what face we have when we listen and when we speak. These are all useful questions, not to judge ourselves, but to visualize the situations we would like to be in.
Fourth step: ask yourself just these kinds of questions: what do I like? In terms of behaviors, words, silences, background music, light, times of day, clothing, scents, candles. The basis lies in imagining a appointment type and really go into detail, even visualizing one’s own body.
Fifth step: experiment. Don’t stop in the comfort zone, don’t stay in what you know. Search, explore, watch movies, magazines, ask for advice, in short, go to theadventure sensory.
The erogenous potential of the skin
The skin completely covers us and in fact is the largest organ of the integumentary system. In summary, we have an organ that covers us for an area of 2 m² and has functions of protection (muscles, internal organs, bones) and receiving and sending signals. Taking care of one’s skin after working out, choosing the bubble bath one loves, devoting oneself to giving and getting massages, these are all very useful tips for those who want to get in touch with pleasure.
An extragenital organ that is sometimes excluded from the erotic sphere when talking about sex but instead for all intents and purposes, because of nerve endings, has a erogenous potential disconcerting. When you approach someone you like, do not underestimate the great responses that skin contact generates and creates. And, if you have a regular partner, if you have been sharing your life for a long time with someone, you can start precisely from unexplored corners of skin or that you have come to love over time as it is an immense map, a “fertile ground” full of treasures.
