The difference between coming out and outing: let’s clarify

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  1. Coming out is a personal choice. It’s about revealing one’s identity, often to loved ones, and is a deeply personal journey.
  2. Outing is when someone else reveals your identity. This can be done without your knowledge or consent, and can have serious consequences.
  3. Coming out is about self-acceptance. It’s a process of acknowledging and embracing one’s true self.
  4. Outing is often done without consideration for the individual. It can be hurtful and cause harm.
  5. Coming out is a step towards liberation. It’s about finding freedom and authenticity.
  6. Outing is a violation of privacy. It can be a way to cause shame and distress.
  7. Respecting others’ privacy is crucial. Always consider the impact of your words and actions on others.

https://www.thetrevorproject.org/resources/what-is-coming-out/
https://www.glaad.org/issues/lgbtq-rights/coming-out

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Coming out and Outing are not synonymous

In recent years, terms such as “coming out” and “outing” have become increasingly common in our everyday vocabulary, mainly due to the growing visibility of the LGBTQIA+ movement. However, in Italy, there is still much confusion about what exactly these terms mean. Understand the difference between “coming out” and “outing” is not just a matter of language, but a fundamental step toward the respect for LGBTQIA+ people.. Let us discover together the differences between these concepts and see some useful tips for approaching these situations with sensitivity and respect.

What it means to come out

Coming out is an abbreviation of the expression “coming out of the closet,” which in Italian literally translates to “coming out of the closet or closet.” In fact, coming out means “coming out,” “declaring oneself,” or “coming out of the closet”-whichever way you want to put this phrase, coming out is a voluntary act by a homosexual or bisexual person to declare and disclose his or her sexual identity to other people. The person who consciously decides to make this act of declaration to others has probably already accepted and overcome anxieties that may be linked to fear of rejection or judgment. It is an important gesture, of great value to the person who decides to share his or her sexual orientation with others.

What outing means

Outing, a term that can be translated as “throwing out,” is conversely a term that defines an act of violence toward the person who suffers it: this word is used to identify the attitude of making public the sexual orientation of another person, who at the time did not want to share or disseminate. Often outing is done in the world of entertainment or politics, when the person being outed has a public role anyway, to discredit him or her or to undermine his or her confidence by attacking him or her on a purely private and personal matter.

So, in summary:

  • Coming out: is a conscious action and personal choice in sharing your sexual orientation with the people you want;
  • Outing: is a disclosure made by others concerning the disclosure of another person’s sexual orientation without his or her consent.

Tips on how to come out

Of course, coming out is a totally private and personal process, so it is right and normal for each person to follow his or her own way and pace. Additional help can come from the psychological support, useful to live this moment in the best and peaceful way possible; however, there are also some tips that can help to approach coming out in a positive and conscious way.

Here are some steps, some tips that could help in coming out and understanding the path behind such an action, to try to empathize so as to avoid coming out:

  • The importance of awareness: essential before coming out to be completely calm in self-acceptance. Living one’s sexual orientation or gender identity with peace of mind and awareness will give one the strength needed to experience the moment of sharing with self-confidence and in total harmony.
  • Choice of venue: It is important to identify the right time and place to share this information with the people you want. It will be a touching, engaging and sincere moment, so it is advisable to choose a quiet place and a moment of serenity, avoiding periods of stress or particular tension.
  • Be prepared for multiple scenarios: The socio-cultural context in Italy is not the best, and often prejudice and negative thinking can take acceptance of homosexuality to a complex level. Just as it may take time for the person coming out, it may take time in accepting the homosexuality of a child, a relative, a friend. Respect is the basis of everything and everyone.
  • With support is better: Having support is important, so when deciding to come out it can be crucial to have someone close by who already knows, so as to convey strength and confidence to those who have decided to face this moment.

How to handle coming out

Sometimes outing is done with “malice,” other times it can be a gesture of superficiality and carelessness. In fact, it is often overlooked that behind the process of self-acceptance, including gender and sexual orientation, there are complex moments, anxieties, fears that should not be underestimated and, therefore, deserve respect and delicacy in dealing with them. That is why it is not recommended to pressure or maliciously investigate sexual orientation of a person: when they are ready, they will be the ones who want to share their sexual orientation or gender identity with whomever they want. It is therefore important to respect the time frame for an individual’s self-determination: coming out can generate insecurities, anxieties and bewilderment; it is a lack of respect and privacy important and no one can give us this right over another person.

Lee Huxley
WRITTEN BY

Lee Huxley

Lee Huxley is an internationally known confidence and dating coach with nearly a decade of experience. He is the successful author of several dating and confidence books that have helped thousands of men find incredible results that they didn’t even think was possible. While traveling the world Joe consistently finds new and valuable ways to meet and attract women that men everywhere can use immediately.

Joe has a Bachelor’s Degree in Multimedia Journalism from Bournemouth University and has been featured in many large publications including AskMen, TSB Magazine and Dumb Little Man.